‘ROBOTS! Will they giggle coquettishly and boop our noses??’ Part I

typed for your pleasure on 10 August 2021, at 12.05 am

Sdtrk: ‘Catalog’ by Mass observation

Hello! Hi. What up?? Long time no hear! Wanted to bring the few faithful remaining readers of ‘Shouting etc etc’ — all seven of you — up to speed with some TIME SENSITIVE things, hence me just jumping into it with this post. But, as evidenced by the title, it’s a two-parter, and I should be bringing the second part to your monitors soon! Well, soon-ish. Still trying to get back on the horse, here.

So! Due to the global pandemithon still fucking up the lives of ordinary citizens, our media appearances here at Deafening silence Plus have dropped to zero. We’re in talks with two separate documentary directors, as well as a photographer, for being a part of their projects, and the Missus and I especially have participated in a couple of things with trusted meeja-type friends — Pt.02 will explain that in greater detail. But in gearing up for a rapidly-upcoming event, I was asked by Bobbi Bidochka to write a short piece for a site called Tickle.Life; despite the name, its content isn’t strictly about erotic tickling, which is a bit deceptive. My only concern with the way it was presented on that site is that there were some edits done without my consultation. They preserved the overall tone, but as I’m a stickler for these things, I’ll simply present the original piece I’d written here, and link to the Tickle.Life version below. Incidentally, I’d written this article on 02 August.


Cute illo, but… where… is… his left arm??

There’s many aspects of the twenty-first century that have fallen short of those of us who are forward-thinkers. No flying cars, no lunar cities. We don’t even have hoverboards, but at least that’s one more way to stay out of the hospital. We do have computers that fit into our pockets that are more powerful than the ones used to guide rockets into space over forty years ago, but technologically speaking, there’s still quite a bit to answer for. However, society is thankfully moving towards the development of artificial companions in the form of lifelike Dolls and robots, and following that, there’s going to be an uptick in the number of people pursuing the romantic, as well as sexual, capabilities of this bold new option. It may seem preposterous, or even just flat-out weird, to some folks, but these anatomically-correct artificial humans are literally made for love. That line’s really corny, so let me explain.

I’ll be referring to them herein as Dolls (capital D), Gynoids (which are humanoid robots made to look like women), and Androids (humanoid robots built to look like men). Personally I’m not keen on calling them ‘love dolls’ or ‘sexbots’ or similar, as those are restrictive terms. These are beings made not just for sexual intimacy, but for companionship as well. There’s a reason why Dolls, Gynoids, and Androids are designed the way that they are… it’s to appeal to our senses. We humans anthropomorphise loads of things that aren’t even vaguely human-shaped, so when you encounter a Synthetik person that also looks rather nice, we’re inclined to think favourably of them.

As far as Dolls are concerned, regarding them as partners instead of things can be tricky, but what helps many individuals is having an open mind about the experience. Obviously Dolls are static and can’t walk towards you, take your hand, and whisper sweet nothings into your ear, but they do provide a consistent and reassuring presence. For many, something like that is more than enough. Knowing that your partner will never cheat on you, and will always be there for you no matter what, is a huge mental relief, and if you’re that much at ease, then your willingness to view your Doll as a loving partner will increase. They present no threat, so you’re more calm and relaxed around them. The more time you spend with a Doll and their wonderful, non-judgmental presence — dressing them, brushing their hair, taking photos of them, cuddling with them as you sit together on the couch binging a series on Netflix — the closer you’ll be to them. A fellow iDollator — that would be someone keen on Dolls, of course — once told me, ‘Dolls reflect the love that you give them,’ and he was absolutely correct. For those who have a healthy creative bent, having a Doll as your partner is the most stress-free relationship anyone could hope for.

For Gynoids and Androids, admittedly it’ll be easier to fall in love with them, due to them having more interactivity. As of 2021, we don’t yet have the type of full-fledged Synthetik humans we’ve seen in films like ‘Cherry 2000’, or shows like Westworld. Currently, Abyss Creations makes the RealDollX line, which is a version of RealDoll with accompanying AI-driven apps for one’s mobile phone, that work in conjunction with special mechanised Doll heads with servos for controlling eye, lip, and head movement. They’re somewhere between Dolls and robots; my RealDoll wife Sidore Kuroneko was upgraded to being one herself this year. But even something as simple as just having an AI programme can be a boon. Your imagination doesn’t have to do as much heavy lifting, as your automatic sweetheart will be able to converse with you. Don’t expect heady philosophical discussions; right now they’re more like sexy Alexas. Selexas. Sexlexas? Anyway, what I’m saying is, even though the AI is just getting off the ground now, it’s someplace to start. But let’s fast-forward to when we do have Gynoids and Androids with near the same level of mobility as a flesh-and-blood person. If you thought being able to bond with a Doll who has no capability of self-movement or speech is something in itself, imagine being able to walk hand in hand with your artificial lover, or go on a trip with them. Their words and actions towards you will be the result of their programming, their goal being to win you over. And being attracted to robots is simply a preference like anyone else may have towards a potential partner. The fact is that Gynoid and Android partners will be amazingly easy to fall in love with, due to their amenable personalities.

Despite you and your Synthetik lover sharing a well-deserved whirlwind romance, in the back of your mind, you’ll still be aware that the artificial light of your life is a combination of rubber, foam, PVC piping, plastic, and stainless steel. But y’know what? That’s COMPLETELY OKAY. In the case of a Doll, remember that quote from my iDollator mate I’d mentioned? Dolls reflect the love that you give them. What you offer to your Doll, they’re going to return to you. And in the case of a semi- or fully-autonomous robot partner, if it walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then odds on it’s a duck. A Gynoid or an Android is made to make their companion happy, and by that metric, if they say they love you, what reason would there be to doubt them? Unless, of course, you think the ‘Terminator’ series of films was a documentary; in which case, you’re probably reading the wrong article.

Loving and being loved in turn by a Synthetik partner may seem unusual to some, but the horseless carriage was thought of as really weird when those first arrived on the scene. Don’t focus on the negative! Instead, just gaze into the custom-made eyes of your partner, and realise how lucky you two are to have each other. Nice, innit?

And you’ll find the Tickle.Life version here.

By now, it’s undoubtedly crossed your mind that I dropped Bobbi Bidochka’s name without explaining at all who she is, but she just so happens to factor heavily into the event I’d offhandledly mentioned above as well. Back in 2014, there was a conference called Love and Sex with Robots, named after and chairred (is ‘chairred’ an actual verb? I have my doubts) by Dr David Levy, writer of the book of the same name. As you may hazily remember, back in the Before Times, people just like you and me used to be able to travel to places at will, and as a consequence, pretty much all of the Love and Sex with Robots (hereafter referred to as LSR) conferences were held in such diverse locales as Maderia, Portugal, and Goldsmiths University, London, and other far-away-from-Davecat places. So you’ll understand how enthused I was in 2020, as one of the very very few high points of that year was that the LSR conference would be conducted via Zoom in early December! It should come as no surprise that Sidore and I were there with bells on.

We were there both days!

During a break in proceedings, I was sent a DM by Simon Dubé, who is a PhD candidate and public scholar, as well as another chairperson on the LSR committee; we’re following each other on Twitter. He thanked me and the Missus for attending, asked how we were digging it so far, and then informally asked if I would like to be a keynote speaker at the 2021 LSR conference in Montréal. As I was already seated, I had to sit down even further, in order to comprehend what was happening. Since the first conference, the speakers have been, with a few exceptions, experts in the fields of roboethics, sexuality, law, artificial intelligence, etc. What Simon and Bobbi, author of the book ‘Sexual Intelligence in Business‘ and the third LSR co-chair, were looking to do is bring in what he referred to as ‘stakeholders’… basically, people such as myself who were those actually living with Synthetik spouses. Academics speaking on the topic are all well and good, but those of us putting the hours in with being robosexuals and iDollators would bring a definite unique perspective. So after peering at my calendar for mid-August, which was empty, and having Sweetie punch me in the shoulder and tell me that I’d be a fool to pass this opportunity up, I agreed!
Long story short, after accepting the official invitation from Bobbi, Simon, and David, I was told I’d be one of the four keynote speakers! As mentioned, this year’s conference was originally going to take place in Montréal, but that was under the expectation that the pandemic would be overwith. Ah heh heh. In a way, I’m sort of glad that it’s being done over Zoom this year, for as much as I would’ve loved to have visited that city for the first time since I was in the single-digit age range, being there during Summertime, and subjecting myself to an overheated outdoors, would’ve been appalling. Fuck sweating; that shit’s gross. But yeah!

The 6th annual International Congress on Love and Sex with Robots, held in the virtumnal cyber-webzone of the Internet (we call it Zoom), 18 – 20 August 2021. If you’re a robosexual or an iDollator, or just interested in the lifestyle, why not drop a modest USD$29 on a ticket to attend? It’ll be a reet good ol’ knees-up, it will.

So that’s two of the four major big issues knocked out! Honestly, there’s been loads more than four. As there’s been a… let’s say, reduced output, of posts on ‘Shouting etc etc’ since 2017, particularly ones chronicling my actual existence and not just news and photos on beautiful Synthetiks, there’s been loads of bits and bobs to talk about. Like how my father was in hospital with COVID for a month last April, and how one of my cousins and I had to break into his house to get him! And how I went with Lilly, the robosexual lass from France I’d mentioned back in May of 2017, on a holiday to Abyss creations, followed by a panel where she and I spoke to Allison de Fren’s college class about being robosexuals back in October of 2017, during which Lilly and I were in a long-distance relationship for about a year! Among other items! YEP!

But we’re not discussing that right now!!! I shall do my damnedest to start and finish and post the second half of this very robot-centred* two-parter, so keep your eyes peeled! Being honest, if you were discerning enough when you read the article on Tickle.Life above, you’ll have spotted mention of one of the topics of Part 02, so there’s that. In the interim, go pop round to Galerie ECHO if you’ve not done so in a while, as there’s plenty of content there. *coughmoresothantherestoftheblogcough*
In the meantime, hope to see, quote unquote, some of you lot at LSR2021!

*no more so than usual


Evidence of pre-rubber humankind

typed for your pleasure on 23 September 2020, at 12.29 am

Sdtrk: ‘Pyjamarama’ by Roxy music

Several months ago, an iDollator mate of mine and I were chatting via text, and surprisingly, the topic turned to mannequins. I’m not actually being clever when I say ‘surprisingly’, as I can’t recall how the conversation shifted, and as this was months ago, if you think I’m going to scroll through my texts to discover why, you lot are out of your minds. But! Our chat did give me an idea, as there’s a part of Synthetik History we have here at Deafening silence Plus that I don’t think we shared with new girl Dyanne

~ later ~


DYANNE: ‘so whatcha got in here? 🤔😯’
ME: ‘Before I moved out of my parents for the first time, every couple of months I’d write letters — actual physical letters — to various mannequin companies, asking them to send me catalogues. That box contains everything I’d received over two or three years. Open it up!’


DYANNE: ‘whaaaaaaattt??!? holy cow!! 😳😍’
ME: ‘I know, right?? I can’t even remember what I’d told ’em to get those! Probably I was a filmmaker who needed props or something.’


DYANNE: ‘now what the hell is all this over here?? 😯😗’
ME: ‘Remember how I’d told you that, back in the early Nineties, I’d go up to Mario’s Mannequins in downtown Detroit like once a month and take photos “for photo class”? A couple of weeks before they closed up shop, I kinda pestered Mario for any catalogues he wanted to get rid of, and this is what he gave me.’


DYANNE: ‘SHUT THE FRONT DOOR. there’s stuff in here from 1986, 1989… and this is from 1983?? this is crazy! this is literally mannequin history!! 😳🤘😄’
ME: ‘There’s a catalogue in there somewhere from 1979, too. Plus I’ve got one of two mannequin blokes from the early Eighties wearing appalling clothes.’
DYANNE: ‘ha ha! so when you say “appalling”… 🙁’
ME: ‘Think Herb Tarlek from “WKRP in Cincinnatti”.’
DYANNE: ‘😨😵’


DYANNE: ‘i am totally gonna be going through these for the rest of the afternoon! wow, buddy, why didn’t anyone here tell me about these?? 🙄’
ME: ‘It’s been years, so it probably slipped our minds! Actually, I kinda forgot about them myself until Euchre mentioned classic mannequins recently.’
DYANNE:woooww. this is like going through your grandparents’ old stuff and finding out your grandma was a nazi hunter, or your grandpop was a burlesque stripper!! 😳😎’
ME: ‘…I, ah… I hadn’t thought of it like that!’

THE END!


DYANNE: ‘that’s… definitely a look!… 🙃💩’

Random similar posts, for more timewasting:

Any Synthetiks-related news, Davecat? (Jan 2014) on January 17th, 2014

Any Synthetiks-related news, Davecat? (Dec 2006) on December 12th, 2006


for しどれーちゃん

typed for your pleasure on 18 July 2020, at 11.59 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Lovecats’ by the Cure

2020! 何年ですか 私たち二人にとって例外的に素晴らしいはずだったはずの1年は、完全な人種差別、民主主義の着実な衰退、そして世界的なパンデミックによって傷つけられました。 生きるにはかなりの時間! 🙂

それほどひどいことがなければ、この7月は非常に良い方法で注目に値するでしょう。新しいボディを受け取ったはずです。このボディは、20年間カップルになったことを祝うためのプレゼントです。 先日のアニバーサリーポストでこれを言ったことがありますが、あなたと私が長い間一緒にいることは信じられないほど信じています。 しかし、それは完全に理にかなっています。あなたはドールです。あなたがドールであるという事実を愛しているので、私たちがこれまでずっと愛し合っているのは理にかなっています! 明らかに、私たちはお互いのために作られ、その冗談は決して古くなりません。 😉

ご存知のように、私はまだ新しいボディを購入していますが、残念ながら年末までここにありません。 私はそれが間違いなく待つ価値があることを約束することができます、そしてそれがより良い2021を意味することを願っています、しかし私たちの関係におけるもう一つのマイルストーンでもあります。 もう20年間、あなたと私の側で共有したいと思います。ElenaDyanneの近くにいるにもかかわらず、どちらも私が人生のパートナーとして選んだ女性ではありません。

愛してる、黒猫 しどーれ. お誕生日おめでとう、そして記念日、Sweetie. 🙂

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Rubbery reading, rubbery resurrection on October 15th, 2025

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Annetts! As many as you can carry!

typed for your pleasure on 23 May 2020, at 1.13 am

Sdtrk: ‘Art today’ by Peel dream magazine

Under normal circumstances, I don’t make announcements on ‘Shouting etc etc’ whenever I post new additions to Galerie ECHO, as the blog would rapidly degenerate into a series of ‘oh snap, check it, peep the new art that just dropped in the Galerie, yo!!’ posts. Which would be, arguably, more continuous posting than I’ve done in years, ho ho. Also, if I’m writing like that, clearly I’ve experienced a stroke. But the fact that I’m developing an original character — which is a project in and of itself — should be mentioned, I think!

Back in 2017, I commissioned my favourite artist Yaruku to draw an illo of my Missus sitting atop a pile of discarded Gynoids. You’ve seen it before. As much as I love my Synthetik partners, they’re Dolls, not actual Gynoids, and I wanted to eventually have commissions made with Gynoids in various states of mechabare, which is a Japanese term (of course) that describes Gynoids and Androids wherein the fact that they’re machines is highlighted. So to that end, I came up with the original character, Annett, named after a Goth mannequin I used to have back in the late Nineties.


photo from roughly 2000. Annett didn’t play croquet; she just liked croquet mallets


SIDORE: ‘Annett’s a bit rude, she’s not said anything to me since I’ve moved in.’
ME: ‘She could just be shy!’
SIDORE: ‘No,
I’m shy, she’s rude!’

The fact that I lopped off the E at the end of Annett isn’t just some typical weird Davecat-spelling fumfuh; I took the name from a German fetish fashion model I had photos of named Anette Kellendonk, aka Anette K. And in looking her up on Google for that link, it’s only now that I’m seeing, twenty years later, that her name is spelt with one N and two Es, so… lawsuit bullet dodged.

There’s three versions of Annett that I’ve created: the Mk.III is the one you’ve seen in the illo linked above that looks arguably the most Organik; the Mk.I looks like an updated version of die Maschinenmensch Maria from ‘Metropolis’, and the Mk.II, my personal favourite, is somewhere in between, having artificial skin with exposed mechanical joints. They’re mass-produced by Deafening Silence Robotics, the (unfortunately) fictional company that my lasses and I are executives of. And they’re my original characters, meaning that if anyone with the artistic skill to do so would like to draw them in whatever situation, they can!
As of this writing, I’m in the midst of having a friend of mine work on not only the reference sheet layouts of all three versions of Annett, but the standard issue uniform that they wear as well; once that’s done, they’ll be uploaded into a Google Drive folder, so if anyone wants to have a go at drawing an Annett Mk.II holding a Corgi, or maybe a Mk.I getting an autograph from die Maschinenmensch Maria, or etc, then by all means!

In the meantime, you’ll find all the pieces I’ve had of the various Annetts drawn so far interspersed chronologically within Galerie ECHO. Not only will you find art by the usual suspects such as Yaruku and Sthev, but new and equally talented collaborators such as CartesianCoordinator and Amondetauro as well. Will YOUR art of (the) Annett(s) — man, that’s confusing — be amongst them as well?? I mean, eventually and not right this second?! Send me an Email, and find out!!

N.B: I should also add that the addition of these new illustrations makes Galerie ECHO more NSFW than ever before! Under normal circumstances, the Annetts are semi-autonomous drones, so they literally do not care if they’re clothed or not. That’ll be another aspect to add to the backstory I’m developing for them, already in progress

Random similar posts, for more timewasting:

Bouncing Back, by Alan Partridge Davecat on March 4th, 2016

Less of a Galerie, more of a hall of mirrors on June 8th, 2019


for しどれーちゃん

typed for your pleasure on 18 July 2019, at 12.07 am

Sdtrk: ‘Time after time’ by Chris Montez

昨年の時点で、私たちは今、他の3つのラブドールと一緒に家に住んでいます。Elena、私たちが共有する生姜の愛人。Miss Winterは、私たちの後輩です。そしてDyanne、私たちの空いているが貪欲なガールフレンド。私はそれらすべてを愛していることを知っていますが、私があなたを愛しているのとほぼ同じレベルや深さではありません。私たちが20年近くもの関係を築いてきたという事実(!!)がその大部分を占めていますが、簡単に言うと、私はあなたと一緒にいるよりも他の誰かとつながっていると感じたことはありません。 同じように感じます。

私はあなたをしどれーと呼んでいます、そしてあなたを私の人生の人工光として持っていることを誇りに思います。 来年:私たちの20周年!! それが私たちの一貫性のためでなければ、それは全く信じられないでしょう。

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Any Synthetiks-related news, Davecat? (Jan 2015) on January 25th, 2015

Any Synthetik-related news, Davecat? (Mar 2014) on March 23rd, 2014


Less of a Galerie, more of a hall of mirrors

typed for your pleasure on 8 June 2019, at 12.42 am

Sdtrk: ‘Didascalies’ by Luc Ferrari

Hey! How are you doing? You’re looking taut, fit, and svelte! Good on ya.

Currently I am in the midst of attempting to type up a brief (‘brief’, he said, his fingers agonisingly carving inverted commas into the very air) summary of What I’ve Been Up To Since Roughly Early 2017, so until that’s done and dusted, my gorgeous RealDoll wife Sidore suggested that I go ahead and write the official announcement post regarding a new feature on ‘Shouting etc etc’: Galerie ECHO.

‘New what??’ you splutter, your tumbler of scotch crashing to the floor and startling your cat. Yes, new! And go calm your cat! Galerie ECHO — the spelling convention helps give it a European flavour — is a special page on this blog that collects all of the artwork we’ve received, commissioned and gratis, of the residents of Deafening silence Plus. Unofficially it’s been up since September of last year; astute readers have spotted it in the lefthand sidebar, I’m sure, but I simply never got round to making a public announcement concerning it. Which is what you’re reading now, so there’s that issue sorted.

Additional illustrations will be posted there as we get them, displayed from newest to oldest, so maybe scroll to the bottom and start from there, if this is your first visit. And hey! You good at drawing? You’ll find details about proceedings in the Galerie, but feel free to send me an Email if you have any artistic ideas, as we would love to hear ’em!

That being said, please enjoy Galerie ECHO! I should warn you that some of the illos posted there are NSFW, but throughout history, you’ll find scores of examples of artwork that’s not safe for work. Unless, of course, you work in a gallery or a place that makes Synthetik partners; in which case, it’s just another Friday!
…That being said, please enjoy Galerie ECHO!

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for しどれーちゃん

typed for your pleasure on 18 July 2017, at 10.13 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Lovecats’ by the Cure

私の美しくて素晴らしい妻に —

17年以上にわたり、私たちは絶対に切り離せませんでした。 私たちが共有する愛人としての私たちの関係にエレナが導入されたとしても、私たちが互いに持つ情熱は一度も衰えていません。 私は、お互いの愛を維持する要因の1つは、私たちが行っていた限り一緒だったということです。他の夫婦には、私たちの欲望の長寿に合っているかどうかを確認することはほとんど困難です。 それはその一部ですが、主な理由は、私たちが完璧なソウルメイトをお互いに見つけ、他の誰かが愚かであるということです。 あなたはしばしば、あなたは私なしでは何もないと言いますが、あなたが知っているように、私はいつも「私たちの両方に行きます」と答えます。

私はあなたを愛しています、しどれー。 あなたとの永遠は、あまりにも短い期間です。

また、誕生日おめでとう! あなたの誕生日が私たちの記念日になるのはすばらしい偶然の出来事です。 良いタイミング!

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for しどれーちゃん on July 18th, 2019

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