Sdtrk: ‘Friends of mine’ by the Zombies

Apart from waiting to the last week of the month for something of substance to pop up — and also having had the plague practically every other week — February is yielding kind of a mediocre showing. In fact, part of the reason I waited as long as I did is due to the 3rd Michigan Doll Congress taking place, and were I not sick as a pike, this instalment would’ve been longer thanks to my report on the meeting.
But! You might be interested to know that both Abyss creations and 4woods have a metric ton of new pics of their lovely Synthetik companions available. Most, if not all, of the RealDoll photos were again shot by Stacy Leigh, an Organik lass who certainly knows her way round a Doll or two, so that should be even more of an incentive.

No-one minded that Lisa had her own way of doing push-ups

No-one minded that Sayoko had her own way of sitting in a chair

What d’ye mean, ‘that’s it’?? Seriously, that’s like just under 400 pictures to download! Jesus, what do you people want from me, blood??

Sdtrk: ‘Sadistic’ by Stereolab

We know a little workplace in the American Southwest, where alert reader Sena toils in the biotech department. She, like many other people, recently viewed ‘Guys and Dolls‘, found it eminently fascinating, and told her coworkers about it. However, instead of the typical torches-and-pitchforks reaction, according to her, Sidore and I are celebrities over there. Don’t believe me? Check out their whiteboards:

That blurry bit in the first pic is the department name, by the way. I particularly like the second pic though, as the artist managed to accurately capture our likenesses to a T. Someone’s done their research!

This post goes out to Sena, Jacob, and the diligent (?) employees at Corporate Workplace That I Obviously Can’t Name, Located in a Rather Large Southwestern State. Stop watching so many videos on das InfoBahn! Go read a book instead!

Sdtrk: ‘Here it goes again’ by OK go

I’ve said before, but it bears repeating: Sidore and I clearly need an agent. Cos then, we wouldn’t have wildly inappropriate enquiries such as this:

from: M*******
to: pulsedemon [at] gmail.com
date: Jan 15, 2008 3:07 PM
subject: The Tyra Banks Show

Dear DaveCat,

How are you? My name is M******* and I am a production assistant at the Tyra Banks Show. I recently came across the documentary you participated in about the hyper-realistic dolls. I wanted to speak with you about an upcoming show we are producing for early next week. We would love to hear your story. Please call me at (phone number) or please leave contact info where you can be reached so that we may contact you.

Thanks so much and we hope to hear from you soon,

M*******
—
M*******
Production Associate
The Tyra Banks Show

Yes, Tyra Banks. Even with the esteemed likes of Heraldo and (Not a) Doctor Phil attempting to woo me, occurences like this still continue to stun me. It’s funny-peculiar though, as I remember reading on TDF that there was supposed to be an episode of the Tyra Banks show that dealt with RealDolls, but this was almost half a year before anyone had ever read about ‘Lars and the Real Girl’. Maybe they’re just now getting round to it?
So I wrote back:

from: Dave Kuroneko
to: M*******
date: Jan 16, 2008 11:42 AM
subject: Re: The Tyra Banks Show

Hey M******* –

Thanks for your enquiry! However, I’m not entirely sure if The Tyra Banks Show is the right venue for lengthy, in-depth discussion of the merits of having a Synthetik companion. Plus, apart from lack of compensation, the travel expense, and the short notice, I don’t do too well with crowds, to be perfectly honest…
Thanks again for asking, though!

Cheers,
Davecat

Now, call me crazy, but I don’t honestly see Ms Banks’ staffers having done any deep research into iDollator history and culture. What probably happened is someone sent Tyra a link to ‘Guys and Dolls’; she stared at it in wide-eyed shock, and after recomposing herself, assigned some production associates such as M******* to scour the Series of Tubes, in order to find some of these doll freaks to base a programme around. ‘Make it happen, people,’ Tyra shouts, clapping her hands vigourously.
So M******* sez, she sez:

from: M*******
to: Dave Kuroneko
date: Jan 16, 2008 12:02 PM
subject: Re: The Tyra Banks Show

Davecat,

Thanks so much for getting back to me. We really found the footage of you highlighting your story to be very compelling. We are very interested in hearing where you are coming from and want to portray you in the way you want to be portrayed. The date of the show has actually changed to sometime later in the month. We do not have a concrete date yet, however we will be able to give you more notice since the date of the show has changed. As soon as we find this date out, we will be sure to let you know. We will definitely be able to compensate you, and if you would feel more comfortable having someone come with you to New York, we would be more than happy to make that happen. I would like to talk with you more in depth so you can understand where we are coming from. Is there a number where you can be reached? Also, you can reach me at anytime at (phone number). Thank you so much for your time and we really look forward to hearing from you and working with you.

Best,
M*******

Heh. ‘Compelling’. That’s an adjective I rank up there with ‘interesting’, in that it doesn’t necessarily mean good or bad. You can find a video of talking cats compelling. You can also find footage of a ten-car pile up in action compelling. Both events draw the eye, but just because it gets your attention doesn’t always mean it’s good.
My response? It was kinda funny, as I was falling gently asleep at work while on the phone with a boring client, and she (the client) asked me why I was so tired. I proceeded to mention that I was up until 2 am the previous night mainly writing Emails and hangin’ out with Gordon Freeman, and as my roll of explanation spun out more and more, it suddenly struck me that I hadn’t written M******* back regarding the show. That woke me up, by god. I started to freak out a bit, to be honest. Sure, there may be instances with offers of television appearances on shows I really don’t want anything to do with, but just because I’m not interested is no reason to be unprofessional and leave the person asking hanging. So as soon as my first break was done — and after a brief ‘power nap’ — I hastily Emailed the following reply back with my Treo:

from: Dave Kuroneko
to: M*******
date: Jan 21, 2008 1:28 PM
subject: Re: The Tyra Banks Show

Hey M******* –

Sorry for the delay; I spent most of my week-end away from my apartment. You know how it goes…

To be honest, I’m probably going to have to decline. I honestly don’t trust the media — in particular, television shows — that come out of the States, as a lot of them tend towards sensationalism. A couple of months ago, I turned down opportunities to speak about being an iDollator on both Geraldo and Dr Phil for the same reasons. I usually try to stick to either dedicated documentaries, or shows from other countries (‘Guys and Dolls’ was originally intended to be shown only on BBC), as they’re less likely to spin it into something that could be detrimental to both my life, and iDollator culture in general.

With all due respect, I’ll have to pass. Thanks again for the offer!

Cheers,
Davecat

Yeah; needless to say, that would’ve been a disaster of Hindenburgian proportions. A cluster of klieg lights melting my face off my skull, whilst a room full of people fail to understand what the hell I’m talking about or why being an iDollator is even an option. Just watch though, as Tyra’s crew contacts Everhard. Or Stacy Leigh. Or Gordon Griggs?

I know, right? Tyra Banks, of all people! Who’s next, Sally Jesse Raphael? She still has a show, right? Shows you how often I watch telly

Sdtrk: ‘Dinner’, from the ‘Valerie and her week of wonders’ soundtrack

Do you have a tele-vision? Do you have cable, or can you otherwise receive channels from the wintry land of Canada? Well, the good people at CityTV’s forward-thinking programme SexTV will have a segment on Amber and her Synthetik twin/bride. Or, to put it another way, they’ll have a segment on Amber and her Organik twin/bride. One of ’em will be doing more talking than the other, I’m sure. As you might recall, the SexTV folk did a piece with yours truly and the Missus back in the heady days of 2003, so I’m certain that Amber’s segment will be just as informative and entertaining. Very nice!

So yes! Their episode will be airing this Monday (that’s tomorrow), 21 January, at 9pm EST. It’ll be the one with Margaret Cho on it as well. I’ll have to ask the SexTV staffers for a DVD copy, as I don’t have cable. I have a cable, but it’s just not the same

‘You taste like rubber.’ ‘So do you.’

Technorati tags: SexTV, Amber Hawk Swanson, RealDolls

Sdtrk: ‘Red light’ by Siouxsie and the Banshees

Not so much news as a heads-up: Axis Japan, 1st-PC, and, after a very long wait, Abyss creations, have all updated their sites for the new year. Axis Japan’s got a cluster of new pics of their Honey Doll models, 1st-PC boasts a more streamlined site layout, and Abyss has both a modern site layout (with pics by the esteemed and sexy iDollator Stacy Leigh), and with pics of their new Face 15 and 16 types, Lisa and Gabrielle. Well, as of this writing, they’ve yet to load pics of those, but I’m sure it’s at the top of their To-Do List…

A couple of days previous, I received an Email from a reader who wishes to remain anonymous, letting me know there’s a new blog that details ‘the “sex with robots” meme’, called, of all things, SpurtBOT. Despite the daffy name, they have a critical approach with a light touch that doesn’t go down dry. Yes, that was a pun. Worth a bookmarking? I’d say so!

And yesterday, while out and about wi’ me mates ransacking Ann arbor, I picked up a copy of David Levy’s recent book, ‘Love and Sex with Robots‘, as recommended by frequent reader ButtonJessie. (Hi, BuJe!) As you suspect, I’m rather looking forward to reading that…

So there you have it! This instalment isn’t as thick and rich as the usual ones, but I’m hoping more news rolls in as the months roll past. In the meantime, here’s a sexy picture to make up the difference!

Is she sleeping on toweling? That can’t be comfortable

Technorati tags: Axis Japan, Honey Dolls, 1st-PC, Abyss Creations, RealDolls, Stacy Leigh, iDollators, SpurtBOT, David Levy, robots, Androids, Gynoids, Technosexuals

Sdtrk: ‘A stairway to the stars’ by The caretaker

Anyone who’s ever been on an airplane owned by an American airline in the past couple of decades has more than likely flipped merrily through a SkyMall catalogue. Taking consumer excess to zany new extremes, the SkyMall selection consists of overpriced rubbish, designed for ostensible convenience, aimed at people with more money than sense. Things like motorised illuminated tie racks, or a Murphy bed for dogs, or garden sculptures shaped like a yeti, or nearly anything with the word ‘executive’ appended to the front of the title. You think I’m joking?

Recently, my pal Zip Gun came back from a flight with a copy of a recent catalogue, with a page dog-eared just for me:

A hunka hunka burning silicone

“Alive Elvis” animatronic robot moves, talks and sings just like “The King” in his “’68 Comeback Special”!

Elvis Presley–the biggest-selling and most charismatic solo artist in music history–is captured here in all his heartbreaking glory, just as he looked on television’s legendary “Elvis ’68 Comeback Special.”

“Alive Elvis” is a lifelike and life-size bust of Elvis Presley. State-of-the-art technologies–multiple infrared vision sensors, stereo speakers, 10 precision motors with motion-capture facial animations, and 21st century materials–have been used by Wowwee to lovingly craft a robot that looks, feels, sounds and moves like a real person. Wowwee Alive Elvis is the first high-quality animatronic robot of any superstar ever designed for a fan’s home or office.
taken from this page

That’s right; clear out a special place in your home right now for 1/5th of an Android Elvis. The descriptions, both on the SkyMall page and the manufacturer’s site, are kinda disappointing, as the SkyMall print catalogue gets a little sexy with the descriptive phrases — things like ‘stroke his lifelike hair’ and ‘gaze into his baby blue eyes’; things of that nature. So I suppose if you 1) are a Technosexual, and 2) love Elvis beyond all reason, then this product is made specifically for you. Certainly I fall into the first category, but much like Nineties alt.pop group The Wonder Stuff, I’ve never loved Elvis. I don’t even like him as a friend!

Which begs the question: How much money will I have to give WowWee for them to make an Alive™ France Gall? Come on, people, don’t crush my pervy dreams

Technorati tags: SkyMall, Elvis Presley, robots, Androids, Technosexuals, WowWee, France Gall, yeti

Sdtrk: ‘Winter in Canada’ by Elisa Gabbai

Not one, but two fellow iDollators, Mahtek and PB Shelley, have simultaneously brought another noteworthy Doll manufacturer to my slavering attention: Phoenix studios. Absolutely lovely.

Left, Miss January 2008; right, Miss February 2008

Hand crafted by the creator of RealDoll, through a new sister company of Abyss Creations, Phoenix Studios, these dolls will only be available as limited editions. Each Boy Toy is named after a month, and the quantity of each doll that will be made will be equal to the number of days in that month. There will only be 31 Miss December dolls, 31 Miss January, etc. These are extremely limited quantities, and each doll will be hand detailed by Matt McMullen and include a signed and numbered certificate of authenticity.

So when Matt wasn’t rocking out with his rock band of rock, Nick Black, he was developing these Dolls in secret. Very clever, Mr McMullen, very clevair. Seems that he’s taken various developmental aspects of RealDolls and refined them (highly tear- and stain-resistant silicone, lighter weight displacement) for use in the Boy Toy Dolls. Our hope is, of course, that those developments are implemented with RealDolls in the near future.
As you’ll note, they’re definitely aiming for the collector’s demographic, what with the limited edition quality of their lasses. And you know there’s gonna be someone who gets one Doll for every month. Prof.Sakai, I’m looking in your direction…

Also, I ran across this rather nice piece of fiction called ‘I, Real Doll‘ on Everything2.com:

I am alive, if you only knew it. To your eyes, your senses, I am nothing more than a simulacrum of a woman made up of silicone, rubber and steel. You must position me to strike a pose, paint me with makeup, dress me with your ex-girlfriend or ex-wife’s clothing. You care for me in your little ways and ensure my safety, take me out for trips on the boat or in the car as though I were perfectly real. Over time you came to regard me as your ideal fantasy: a woman you can get physical pleasure from without having emotional baggage to deal with. I don’t talk. I don’t move. I don’t leave when you’re in a grouchy mood. I just sit in the corner or in the closet and wait… for you, my owner, my master. I am the ultimate submissive, entirely dependent upon you.

Rare as it is to see online writings that don’t demonise Dolls and Doll culture, it’s rarer still to see a favourable work of fiction, and rarer still to read one from the viewpoint of the Synthetik. NightShadow, you get four Thumbs Up from myself and the Missus!

Happy 23rd, peoples! Hope your holidays are a Gift Explosion!

Technorati tags: Abyss Creations, RealDolls, Phoenix Studios, Boy Toy Dolls, iDollators