Sdtrk: ‘Empire state human’ by the Human League

As no-one tells me anything anymore, I learned that BBC America aired Nick Holt’s ‘Guys and Dolls‘ yet again a week or so ago. That particular documentary is like the equivalent of Soft cell’s Tainted love for Sidore and I, or perhaps like Blue Monday by New order — it’s the vehicle that’s brought us to the most peoples’ attention, as most don’t know we’ve done other interviews previously. But I have to say, when we get round to putting in another appearance on telly or film, if nothing else, we can show that we’ve not been living at my parents since last year. Man.
So guess which media juggernaut contacted me recently?

from: Donnelly, Christine
to: pulsedemon [at] gmail [dot] com
date: Mon, Apr 21, 2008 at 4:17 PM
subject: Interview Request – from Alan Colmes

Hi Davecat,

I’m with Alan Colmes’ national radio show.

Last night, I happened to see the BBC America documentary featuring you and Sidore.

We’d love to have you on the show. Both Alan and our audience find this topic very interesting; we had David Levy on the show a few months ago.

What about a phone interview at midnight on Thursday night? Well, technically, that’s Friday, but you know what I mean, right?

It’d be about 20 minutes or so.

If so, at what landline (and backup – like a cell) can you be reached?

Look forward to hearing from you and hope we can arrange.

Best,
Christine

Christine Donnelly
Booker, The Alan Colmes Show

Durr — what? Colmes, of the FAUX News pseudo-pundits Colmes and Hannity? What??
I’d mentioned this invite to New Internet Bestest Friend Forevar, the lovely Gina Banina, during an IM conversation, and she thought it was pretty ace. At that point, I’d asked her if Colmes wasn’t a berserk frothing neo-con, and she replied she didn’t know. I don’t keep up with politics, and I’d only heard tell of Colmes’ and Hannity’s television programme: one representing the left wing agenda, the other plumping for right-wingers, dancing round each other for an hour in an enclosed ring and slicing at the other with homemade prison shanks, their left wrists bound together with a length of rough twine. I hadn’t a clue as to which one was which; however, a quick spin on the Wikipedia wheel set us straight — Colmes was the liberal one. With that news, I began to think that perhaps 20 minutes over the phone wouldn’t be altogether bad… after all, David Levy was once a guest…
I was beginning to consider saying yes, when a crucial factor came to my attention. So I wrote Christine back:

from: Dave Kuroneko
to: “Donnelly, Christine”
date: Tue, Apr 22, 2008 at 6:01 PM

Hello there –
Thanks for posing an enquiry, however, I’m afraid I’ll have to respectfully decline. Basically, I work a staggered shift, which has me getting off at midnight Wednesday through Friday, so I probably won’t be able to do the phone interview. Thanks very much for the opportunity, though!

Cheers,
Davecat, with valued assistance from Sidore

That’s that affair put to bed, right? Wrong. She wrote back almost immediately — literally, like almost half an hour later:

from: Donnelly, Christine
to: Dave Kuroneko
date: Tue, Apr 22, 2008 at 6:25 PM

Dave,

Thanks so much for replying.

Not trying to be a pain here but…we would love to have you on the show! If 12:30am on Thursday (after you get out of work) would work, that’d be great. Or midnight next Monday or Tuesday?

Best,

Christine

One half of my mind’s going ‘well, what’s the harm in it?’ and the other half is shouting ‘your segments in “Guys and Dolls” were misrepresented on Jay Leno and Talk Soup, for fuck’s sake’. Sometimes, bad press is better than no press at all, but that’s only sometimes. With a subject such as being an iDollator, caution when dealing with the media is extremely important. Plus, all told, FAUX News equals high-RPM spin doctoring in my mind.
So days later — which I kinda feel guilty about, as leaving any booking agent hanging is pretty unprofessional — I finally responded:

from: Dave Kuroneko
to: “Donnelly, Christine”
date: Wed, Apr 30, 2008 at 1:17 PM

Hey Christine –

Sorry it’s taken so long to get back to you; both my work and my personal life have been in a state of flux over the past few days…

Unfortunately, I think I’ll have to respectfully decline your invite to be on Alan Colmes chat show. To be completely honest, I’m rather distrustful of the way that media, American media in particular, has a habit of spinning topics to serve their own ends, especially in the instance of something as ‘out there’ as being an iDollator. I wanted to have a listen to the interview you say he’d conducted with David Levy, to see how that went, but I was unable to locate it. Besides, the past couple of days at work have been rubbish, and I’m sure that would inadvertently affect my demeanour and circumspection on-air. I’m sure you understand.

Once again, sorry for the delay, and thanks for the opportunity!

Cheers,
Davecat

And that seems to have done it. Sigh.
It’s crazy: the venues that I’d want to be interviewed by don’t seem to have any interest in the topic, and the venues I wouldn’t touch with a barge pole are all over me! This, then, is Irony

EDIT (03 May): So I went ahead and made a ‘Circus Minimus’ category, cos this sort of thing is happening more often than I would’ve ever thought possible. Who knew?

Technorati tags: Guys and Dolls, Nick Holt, Alan Colmes, RealDolls, iDollators, David Levy