Sdtrk: ‘A longing to be absorbed for a while into a different and beautiful world’ by Leyland Kirby

If you’ll indulge me for a bit, I’ve a confession to make: lately I’m finding that Heidi Montag lass to be really quite attractive. I’m sure if you have any amount of pop culture leaking into your lives, you already know where this is leading, but if you don’t: basically Ms Montag is an obscenely overpaid professional idiot. She’s apparently what can be loosely termed as an ‘actress’, having appeared on a reality show, as well as laughingly referred to as a ‘singer’, thanks to her full-length album of so-called music. Worse still, she’s a god-botherer as well as a republican — those two categories are usually found joined at the hip. I’d first heard of her sometime a year or so ago, and as she was a reality TV star, any cursory interest I had in her immediately disappeared. That is, until earlier this month.

@davecat doesnt Heidi Montag from MTV’s “The Hills look like a real doll after her recent plastic surgery?

MafiAMillertime | 1:17 AM Feb 2nd from web

As I had no idea who the living hell she was on about, I had to look it up on das Goögle, and ooohh my goodness why hello there.

Fully articulated and posable, with a neck hook for display

According to an article on online gossip rag Access Hollywood:

On November 20, Heidi underwent 10 procedures that included a mini brow lift, Botox in the forehead, nose job revision, fat injections in cheeks and lips, chin reduction, neck liposuction, ears pinned back, breast augmentation revision, liposuction on her waist and thighs and a buttocks augmentation. But, she told Billy she’s not addicted to plastic surgery.

But of course. She then goes on to say:

I’m starting to move my face more and more, [But,] I feel very plastic… especially when I first came out, it was so hard for me even to smile and it’s still hard for me to chew sometimes. But it’s feeling more and more natural everyday because the swelling is going down.

I should point out here that I’m completely for the idea of plastic surgery. As long as it makes the person happy, and if it’s not done to a dangerous and unaesthetic degree, that is. I mean, if you’re gonna get ten procedures done, it may seem practical to have them all done in one go, but you’ll more than likely be living like a Cenobite for a number of weeks. Not too clever, but I guess that’s kinda par for the course with our Heidi.
Furthermore, there’s something to be said about the state of pop culture where people, particularly women, are pressured into valuing appearance over intelligence. Unfortunately, it seems that she’s unaware that pursuing both qualities combines the best of both worlds.

Only $6000, minus shipping and handling

HEIDI MONTAG: Bringing Bold New Meaning to the Term ‘Churl’. But thanks to her new silicone rubber body, she’s much nicer to look at! rrrRowr.
Ergh. That’s enough Hollywood-related talk for a couple of months

Sdtrk: ‘Shadow world’ by Xeno & Oaklander

Figured I’d bang this ‘un out in between chapters of the current post freight train, ‘I burped at Vegas‘. Compared to the previous entries of this series, this one will be shockingly brief!

+ There’s been a surge in hits on ‘Shouting etc etc’ in the past couple of days, and through a quick bit of rooting through my referreral stats, I’d discovered that 4woods has linked to me, on the front page of its English site. Nice!

Gotta love that infinite recursion

As the print has shrunken to near-illegibility, it reads ‘Davecat introduces the latest love doll news from the world. He is a famous person in this field who has been on TV and magazines many times. 4woods met Davecat at 2010 AVN in Las Vegas and personally exchanged words, which was such an honor. He is very interested in Japanese culture as well.’ And cuisine, they neglected to add that I’m very interested in Japanese cuisine. Like right now, for instance. I’ll have an order of zaru soba, an age dashi tofu, and an eel temaki, here! *gestures to imaginary waiter*
4woods joins KnightHorse, makers of the Lovable Doll series, as being the second Synthetik companion manufacturer to link to this humble blog. Thanks Hiroo Okawa, and arigatou 4woods! You guys are awesome! Now, how about sending a charming A.I.Peach Akari round to ours to review? It’s for science.

+ Turns out Hirokazu Kore-eda’s ‘Kuuki Ningyo’, aka ‘Air Doll’, which I’d written about back in July 2009, will be out on DVD in Japan on 26 March. ‘Great for the Japanese,’ you say, with not a small note of sarcasm in your voice, ‘but what about the rest of us who don’t understand moonspeak?’ That’s quite alright, as the Japanese DVD comes with English subtitles, which is actually rather surprising. Not that I’m complaining! CDJapan, for instance, has the limited edition slated as selling for $67, so it’ll go on the wish list — just not necessarily at the top of the wish list. Good lord, though; for $67, you’d think it comes shipped with an inflatable replica of the title star…

+ This interview with Abyss creations’ Matt McMullen, featured on the website 69adget, was more than likely a direct result of the 2010 AVN.

Do you think that most people want a companion in a doll or do they just want to have sex with it?

I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with doll owners that assign fictitious personalities to their dolls. I mean, to me it’s very heartwarming that this doll is able to fill a void that this person has in their life. You know, there are people out there that are incapable of having relationships, or they just don’t want it. Perhaps they’re socially cut off by their own choice. There’s always going to be a human need for companionship and to me there’s nothing wrong with those individuals who want to have a pseudo robotic doll to have in their house and build a relationship with. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it and i would be the last person to judge.

+ And just a wee reminder, you lot remember that the Missus and I will be on the ‘Strange Love‘ episode of National Geographic’s ‘Taboo’ documentary series this Wednesday at 10pm EST, right? Okay, just so you know. Well, know again, that is; some of you are new. Like you in the back with the Franz Ferdinand shirt on, for instance.

‘Shouting to hear the echoes’. Sometimes, I even write about things that aren’t Dolls! Anything’s possible

Sdtrk: ‘Do or die’ by the Human League

Spotted this on Retro to Go: this would be the Mint cube, an .mp3 player designed for the retro mind. This might be the sexiest non-Synthetik thing I’ve seen in a while.

On the top side of Mint cube lays ten buttons, and these buttons are also analog. In the past, cassette players would have this type of analog buttons where you pressed one button and then pressed another button; the first button would pop right back out. Mint cube’s employed same types of button and together with analog indicators; it completely brings out the “retro” styling. In the absence of the LED status light, moreover, users can check its status by looking at which buttons are pressed. When you use Mint cube, it will bring back your memory of childhood, although this statement only applies to people who were born in 80s and before.

The blessed thing has indicator dials, for the love of “Bob”. So sexy. Unfortunately, it appears that Mintpass is a designers’ collective, not a gadget boutique, and as such, their Cube is not for sale. At least not yet, that is.

And what headphones — headphones, not bog-standard earbuds — would do that lovely device justice? Would sir or madam be interested in these, perhaps?

Tracks Headphone Series (headphones & headphones with microphone) are on-ear headphones inspired by the function and design of the old iconic walkman headphones. […] The slider connecting the ear cup and the brace comes in three sets of different colours for customization. For disassembly you can easily slide off your ear cups and pack them securely for transportation or share your music with a friend. The headphones come with a neat carrying bag for protecting the different headphone parts and keeping the wires from entangling with other items in your bag.

Designed and created by Danish firm AIAIAI, the group seem to have a solid grasp of the Eighties aesthetic. Furthermore, you can actually purchase a pair of Tracks headphones right now, if you like. Well, maybe not right now, as all variants (except for peach) are out of stock. Ehh, peach. *waves hand dismissively*

What better combination of music accessories to listen to the Human League’s ‘Dare’ album with, I ask you??

Sdtrk: ‘Skelechairs (Venetian snares remix)’ by Venetian snares

Having never been to Las Vegas before in my life, it was a unique and alien experience to me. Not a bad one, but certainly not what I’m used to. You know you’re in a land — yes, ‘a land’, cos Vegas is kind of like its own country, a bizarre Disneyland for adults — where the traditional rules of day-to-day living don’t apply. Such as when you’re having a pleasant dinner with nine of your mates at a Denny’s, and all of a sudden, the shuddering rumble of a volcano explodes across the road. Of course, it’s not a real volcano; it’s spewing water coloured by lights, and gas jets blast flames into the sky, and of course the tiki soundtrack played over the speakers wouldn’t be found at the site of a genuine eruption, but yep, it’s a volcano. Across from a Denny’s. Sure, why the hell not. Velcome to Wegas!

Back during one of the 2009 autumn Doll Congresses, Mahtek, Euchre, and CJD discussed plans for attending the AVN Adult Entertainment Expo, taking place in Las Vegas during the first week of January, as a handful of Doll manufacturers were going to be there. Since I wasn’t able to make the last one thanks to my laughable finances, they decided that I was coming with them for the 2010 show. I wasn’t going to argue the point! So tickets were purchased, and plans were henceforth made. Needless to say, we were pretty excited about the whole thing!

Click here for the rest of the post, bunky »

Sdtrk: ‘When it rains, the puddles shine black’ by Leyland Kirby

It appears that another one of my favourite authors has passed away: Jerome David Salinger has died of natural causes at his home in New Hampshire, at the age of 91.

JD Salinger, in a recent photo

Obituary: JD Salinger
BBC News | Published Thursday, 28 January 2010

When The Catcher in the Rye first appeared in 1951, chronicling 48 hours in the life of a teenage rebel, Holden Caulfield, as he wanders the streets of New York in a state of mental collapse, it enjoyed early, but modest success.

But within a few years, it had become a bible of teenage dissent in America and a staple of high school and freshman college English courses.

A study of adolescence — at once tender and harshly honest — it spoke for millions of young people who didn’t want to be “phoney” in a commercial, materialistic world.

Caulfield became a cult figure comparable with James Dean, but it seems the novel also had an undesirable influence on Mark David Chapman, who said he killed John Lennon to promote Salinger’s work, and the man who shot and wounded Ronald Reagan, John Hinckley.

Almost immediately after “Catcher” was published, Salinger became disillusioned with publishing.

He hated interviews and contact with the public and in 1953, increasingly fed up with publishing and the public, he bought a house at Cornish, New Hampshire, and retreated into a seclusion that was to last for the rest of his life.
the entire article is here

Like many people, I was introduced to Salinger through ‘The Catcher in the Rye’, which stands as an honest tale of disillusionment. It may be slightly dated — it takes place during the very late Forties — but its sentiment still holds true. But then I began reading his other stories, and pretty much fell unhealthily in love with the Glass family, a family of five brothers and two sisters. They were blessed with precociousness at a young age, which was exploited for years through being panelists on a radio quiz show, and suffered the price for it as they grew older.
From Holden to the Glass family, as well as many other Salinger characters, the underlying theme of many of his stories is that of a dissatisfaction with the way society is, and how short of falling into lockstep conformity, living a decent individualistic lifestyle can be extremely difficult.

Salinger is once quoted as saying that he was in this world, but not of it, which is a sentiment I can completely empathise with. It may sound strange coming from someone who enjoys being a public face for the community that he represents, but apart from the resonant and bittersweet tone of his characters, I always admired the fact that Salinger was a recluse’s recluse, and yet still managed to garner the attention of millions. That’s really something to be proud of

Sdtrk: ‘Notre Prof d’Anglais’ by Chantal Kelly

Ah-hem. Some news in brief!

Last Tuesday, I was unceremoniously fired from my mentally and morally offensive job, after three years of sterling service. ‘Consistently rude and terse to customers’, was their cowardly excuse for letting me go. Frankly, I’m surprised that it took as long as it did. I’m in the midst of rejoining the dole queue, but I’m trying not to let it get me down. As much as I hated that job — and believe me, I fucking loathed that job — I enjoyed receiving money from it. I’m viewing this event as the much-needed arse-kicking I… err, needed… in order to get something that isn’t as hideous and/or pays more. Since the past year and a half, I’d been looking into changing employment, but this should really get me motivated. I’m just not entirely keen on jumping without a parachute, but I’m hoping it turns out for the better real soon…

Just after that, iDollators Euchre, CJD, Mahtek and I attended the AVN expo in Las Vegas, from the 07th to the 11th of this month. It’s safe to say that we had a hell of a time! I managed to compile notes, in between walking up and down Vegas’ main drag and fondling Doll jubbleys, so expect a couple of posts describing the meetup, in protracted detail, relatively soon! Technically, I’ve really no excuse for dragging my heels! It’s not like I have a job to report to or anything!
Sneak preview: one of the many, many highlights of those four and a half days was meeting sexpot photographer of sexpot Dolls, Stacy Leigh! Her sassy firecracker attitude makes me think that meeting her is about as close as I’m gonna get to meeting one of Warhol’s Silver Dream Factory superstars.

photo by Mrs ARDO, who is a star in her own right as well

And would you believe I was interviewed for an article for the Las Vegas Weekly whilst out there? It’s true.

So as I have a bollockload of notes and photos, I’ll attempt to sort the lot out this week and get it all finished!…
Now, let’s see about this godforsaken ‘jetlag’ that I keep hearing so much about. Personally, I don’t believe it really exisZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzz

EDIT (13 Jan): Just got a date confirmation: the episode of National Geographic’s ‘Taboo’ series that we’re in, ‘Strange love‘, will be aired on Wednesday, 10 February, at 10pm. Which will undoubtedly be spread all over the Intersnet about a week later, but there you have it

Sdtrk: ‘The romance of the telescope’ by OMD

Now that I seem to have my iPod properly functioning (although that Shake function is completely worthless. Drop your iPod by accident, and bam! Suddenly you’re listening to a different song. Yeah, that’s practical), I’ve begun downloading various podcasts that catch my fancy. One of them, which is to say two of them, cos they cover the same topic and are released by the same group, would be Talking Robots and Robots, both by the Laboratory of Intelligent Systems (EPFL), in Lausanne, Switzerland. As I usually listen to them on the way to work, currently I’m a third of the way through the interview they conducted with one of my favourite people, David Levy, author of ‘Love and Sex with Robots’, and it makes for encouraging listening! Both podcast series have quite a backlog, so I’m fairly sure they’ll keep me occupied for some time…
Incientally, if anyone out there can suggest any more podcasts that you think I’d like — not just robots and Synthetiks, mind you, but stuff that fits in with the whole ‘Shouting etc etc’ oeuvre — do please let me know!

So what with the timing of me stumbling upon these podcasts, and learning about the following piece in the Washington Times from spurtBOT, it makes for a happy bit of synchronicity:

Are artificial wives on the horizon?
By Paul Christensen | Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Futurologist Ray Hammond says he thinks […] machine consciousness will happen toward the middle of the current century – the same time frame in which Mr. Levy has said robot marriage will occur.

“There will certainly be emotional attachment between humans and machines,” Mr. Hammond says, “although I don’t think ‘marriage’ is anything other than a word for headline writers. People already form weak emotional bonds with inanimate objects, and as objects become increasingly intelligent, these bonds will strengthen.”

Mr. Levy, however, says he thinks sentience is not the real issue. He points out that it isn’t the algorithm people fall in love with, but the convincing simulation. “If a robot appears in every way to possess consciousness, then in my opinion, we should accept that it does,” he says.
the entire article is here

Now, if you’ll recall, the date in this post’s title would be January 2010. That’s two thousand and ten, ladies and gentlemen. Now, it seems to me that if we’re in the future, which is now the present, we should be that much closer to fully-realised artificial humans, right? THIS IS NOT HAPPENING FAST ENOUGH. I’ll even overlook the distinct lack of manned commercial daily flights to one of the many colonies on the lunar surface, or the non-appearance of flying cars, if we can just get this whole Synthetik companion thing kick-started. Not just passive ones, such as Dolls, but active ones, like, I dunno… Cherry 2000. Let’s not have another decade pass without consumer-market Androids and Gynoids, here. *claps hands impatiently*

Until that glorious day arrives, however, we still have new models of Dolls to look forward to, thankfully. SynthCreations, for instance, have secretly debuted a new head for their standard Mecadoll body! Her name is Emanuelle; won’t you make her welcome?

Improved cleavage for… better cleaving

Her face is unusual, cos it falls between my particular parameters of being attractive, and not attractive. But that’s all right, cos again, it fills a niche! What may not be stunning to me may be pants-shrinkingly luscious to someone else, you know…

This here was brought to my attention via Wolfgang: an Organik lass had doll joint tattoos done. It should go without saying that I like the cut of this girl’s jib!

Very nice, but you can’t just stop at the legs! Perhaps this will inspire some enterprising young lass to go for an all-over ball-joint doll tattoo scheme. Hans Bellmer would be proud! And, more than likely, aroused, but you can hardly blame him, really. You can view the rest of the pics over at BME.

And thanks to various friends on le Twittré, I was informed that the episode of National Geographic’s ‘Taboo’ documentary series that Shi-chan and I shot back in June of 09 is finally due out! The episode is apparently entitled ‘Strange Love‘, and the Missus and I are occupying a segment of it, airing our views and voicing our opinions, cos that’s what we do. As of this writing, I don’t have the exact airdate — at the very least, it’ll be after 17 January — but you’ll want to keep an eye out for it, obviously, and I’ll let you know when I know, yada yada yada.
Hey, does this mean people will be hitting me up through Myspace again? Ergh

Technorati tags: Android, Gynoid, robot, Synthetiks, technosexual, Laboratory of Intelligent Systems, Ecole Polytechnique Fédérale de Lausanne, David Levy, Love and Sex with Robots, SynthCreations, tattoos, Hans Bellmer, Body Modification Ezine, National Geographic Taboo